So you’ve finally gotten over the breakup. You’ve cried out all of your tears, tossed out all remnants of your ex’s presence from your room and burned all the photos. Just when you think you are finally over it, you have to face the dreaded post breakup encounter with the ex.

Murphy’s Law definitely applies in this situation. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. Anytime you look and feel your worst, an ex-lover will cross your path. When that fateful day arrives, how will you react? Will you run away or will you pull it off with style? How can you debunk Murphy’s Law?

Acknowledge the Ex

As tempting as it is, do not run in the opposite direction or hide behind the nearest and largest potted plant. You will only wind up feeling embarrassed and childish later on when you replay it in your head. Face your fears and greet him or her with a big, confident smile, no matter how nervous you feel on the inside. And if you have to, fake it!

When you walk away from the situation and realize that you are still in one piece, it will be a huge confidence boost. Once you get over the first awkward meeting, any subsequent meetings will be a breeze.

Focus on the Now

Keep the conversation focused on the present and what is going on in your lives right now. Do not take a walk down memory lane and rehash all the painful details of what went wrong. Avoid all stabs at petty comments. Be careful not to ask for or give up too many details.

Avoid all awkward conversations about your love life and their love life. Send regards to the family or mention your great new job. Heck, even talk about the weather! The more superficial the exchange, the better chance you will leave the encounter unscathed emotionally.

Acknowledge the New Flame

Nothing is more dreadful than running into an ex when he or she is with someone new, who is runway model gorgeous, but don’t let the green-eyed monster get the best of you.

As stomach churning as it may seem to you, be gracious to new person in his or her life. Take this as your cue to really shine. Extend your hand and introduce yourself. The worst thing you can do is ignore your ex’s date. Include him or her in the conversation and if you are bold enough, tell the new boyfriend/girlfriend what a great catch he or she has in your ex. It will be an impressive gesture of maturity and confidence.

Whatever You Do, Don’t Lie

No matter how tempting, just remember, any fibs you tell will come back to haunt you. Resist creating a fantasy story about your fabulous new life without him or her. It is highly likely that your ex will see through you, so avoid the embarrassment. Be confident in your real successes and life.

Keep it Short

Contact with the ex should be kept at a minimum, unless you are fortunate enough that it was an amicable breakup. The longer you linger, the higher the chance of getting into a nasty, bitter argument over the past or having the situation become uncomfortable and awkward. Have a quick chat just to be polite and move on to the next crowd. You never know who you might meet!

Don’t Replay the Meeting in Your Mind

Whew! You actually did it! So, what do you do now? The answer is: Do not pick apart every little gesture, word and detail the two of you exchanged.

Example: “I wonder what that meant?” Instead, congratulate yourself for taking the high road. Celebrate and treat yourself to a coffee or drink.

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play it cool

Yes, this advice is probably hard to swallow and not so easy to live by, but looking back, you can take pride in the fact that you handled the encounter with dignity and self-assurance. Your ex won’t know what hit them!